Febreze, Cakes, and Aino Minako
by Arigatou Sheitarou
Summary: Usagi must resist glomping Rei...'s couch, Rei must succesfully bake a cake for her friend Ami, and Aino Minako recieves a sign from God in the shape of an egg.  Doesn't that sound eggciting?  [ReiXUsagi, MinakoXSetsuna]


**Febreze, Cakes, and Aino Minako**

**A/N: _Ha...Ha ha ha ha...-evil cackle-...This is my Febreze induced scenery. Yes...Alice in Wonderland induced problems...Ha ha ha...SUGAR HIGH! Have fun reading my latest...something._**

It was a normal and ordinary day at the Hikawa Shrine for our favorite Resident Miko. Sweeping the steps was her favorite chore, if only for the fact that she could space out for a while and no one would ever suspect her. It was something important to her, albeit slightly ridiculous, and she knew that if her friends found out, they would think her crazy for dancing with a broom. But her head was in the clouds, and it was because of this that she never noticed her crazy friend and Resident Love Goddess Aino Minako walking up the steps towards her.

It was also because of this that she never noticed that Minako was observing her and jotting down some notes in her notebook. Also, she did not notice that her favorite odango-atama was accompanying her as well, but said odango was holding a bottle of something under her nose while sniffing appreciatively every five seconds…which in itself was completely odd and unordinary.

"Hmm…" Minako muttered, "Rei-chan seems to be spaced out…I wonder…"

She walked up to Rei and waved a hand in front of said girl's face.

"No reaction…" She continued, and jotted it down in her trusty notebook. "I shall have to investigate this further."

She stepped up on her tip toes and placed her mouth next to Rei's ear.

"_Rei-chan…_" She began in a sing song voice, "Usagi-chan just said she loves you!"

And Resident Miko snapped out of her day dream, flamed in the face, and fell backwards on the floor, all the while waving her arms around heatedly.

"W-w-what?!" She sputtered, amethyst eyes wide and alert for the first time in an hour, "U-Usagi said what?!"

With a wide grin, Minako jotted down something else in her notebook while muttering:

"And now I just have to get her to admit it…"

The apparently brain dead odango atama was completely oblivious to what was going on around her, and as such was still sniffing the bottle every five seconds.

"Minako-chan!" Rei growled, "You sick and twisted love goddess! What'd you say that for?!"

"What'd you believe it for?" Minako asked with a pleasant grin.

Rei became oddly quiet, albeit her eye twitched continuously. She stared at the blonde vegetable who continued sniffing her plastic bottle almost obsessively. Scratch that. Just plain obsessively.

"What are you doing here with her, anyway? I thought it would just be us."

Minako shrugged and began walking towards the entrance to Rei's home. Usagi followed without a word.

"Well, since we're baking a cake for Ami-chan, and Mako-chan is distracting her, Usagi-chan felt a bit left out. But then…" Minako trailed off with a small frown.

Rei followed them inside and slid the door shut behind them. Marching up to the table, she leaned on her hand while watching Minako randomly pull out ingredients from the cupboards.

"But then…?" She asked, raising an eyebrow, "Care to explain why she's walking around sniffing…" She peered at the bottle's label, "…Febreze like a bunny sniffing its carrot?"

With a sigh, Minako pried the bottle from Usagi's hands and put it beside the flour on top of the cupboards. Usagi blinked, her eyes clouded.

"No!" She screeched, "My bottle! Febreze!"

She began twitching all over. Sitting down and wrapping her arms around her legs, she began rocking herself back and forth muttering the word _Febreze_ over and over again.

"Well, she was on a major sugar high because she ate ten pounds of chocolate before coming here, so I had to snap her out of it. And I introduced her to the joys of Febreze."

Rei glared at the blonde with the red bow, kneeling down next to Usagi.

"You know how she gets when she eats chocolate! Who gave her those stupid pounds of chocolate?!"

"I dunno. Ask Ami-chan why she wanted ten pounds of chocolate for a science experiment."

Rei twitched.

"She…_knowingly_ ate experimented chocolate…?"

Minako shrugged and nodded.

"It's not my fault she's a freak."

Rei sighed and glared at the odango.

"Baka…baka…Baka Odango!" She shouted, "You could've been killed! We all know that Ami-chan's secret desire is to become a Mad Scientist!"

Minako chuckled to herself at Rei's antics. But the miko then turned on her.

"And why Febreze, of all things…?! You know I spray everything here with it! …She'll eventually find my couch…"

Minako sweat dropped.

"Erm…I picked Febreze because it was the best thing available to snap her out of that stupid sugar high. It's addictive."

"It's worse than chocolate!"

"No it's not! Chocolate is better!"

"No, my friend, Febreze OWNZ!"

Minako shrugged, "Well, you can't really argue against that logic."

Rei nodded her head affirmatively.

"You really can't. Now let's get started on that cake."

**10 Minutes Later…**

"She's licking my couch!"

Minako looked up from her position, cake batter and flour all over her face and clothes. She cracked another egg into the mix and began batting it with a big spoon. Looking through the doorway, she saw Rei in all her 'battered' glory, pointing at the odango haired freak who was glomping the couch and running her tongue down the side. Minako made a face.

"What, she's gonna marry it now? How're they gonna do the deed?" She said, an oddly curious expression plastered on her face, "And why's she gonna go with a couch when she has Rei wrapped around her finger…? I have a feeling that Set-chan will have the answer…"

"Eh?! Baka Minako-chan!" Rei protested, red faced, "She does _not_ have me wrapped around her finger!"

She could almost hear Haruka coughing _Whipped_. She glared at the spot where Haruka would've been.

"Rei-chan, why are you glaring at the fridge?"

Rei whirled around and tossed an egg at Minako.

"The same reason why you haven't told Setsuna-san you love her!"

A hot blush adorned Minako's cheeks, the comment catching her off guard, and as such, the egg hit her straight in the middle of her forehead and she fell back, dropping the mix for the cake to the ground. Rei slipped predictably and knocked the Febreze bottle all over herself. Shaking herself from the impact, she sniffed her shirt.

"Great…" She muttered, "Now I smell of Febreze."

And quite suddenly, someone had jumped her, forcing her back onto the ground. And suddenly, her whole body felt like jelly under Usagi's predatory gaze, her eyes dark with barely suppressed desire. The girl grabbed Rei by the collar of her shirt and placed her lips on top of hers. The kiss was deep, her tongue pushing its way into Rei's mouth, her hand at the back of her neck, drawing her closer. The raven haired miko let out something of a weak whimper at Usagi's suddenly curious hand under her shirt.

Usagi broke the kiss, keeping her lips inches from Rei's.

"You taste like Febreze, cake batter, and cherries…"

Rei fainted. And thus ended the story on how Rei was rendered a vegetable for the rest of the week.

A few feet away, Minako got up from the floor and dusted herself up. Looking over to the other two where Usagi snuggled Rei's limp body, she sighed.

"Ah, young love…" And then, with wide eyes, she shouted, "Oh my god, I've made an eggciting discovery!"

**At the Outers' Residence…**

The phone rang. Setsuna walked over and picked it up.

"Hello?" She asked into the receiver.

"Set-chan! You picked up on my first try!"

"Ah, Minako-chan. Did something happen?"

"God has sent me a sign in the shape of an egg!"

"…And what might this realization be?"

"Set-chan! I've realized that I love you!"

There was silence.

"…I did not foresee this…"

Setsuna fainted.

**_A/N: Not my best, but how'd you like THAT? It was eggciting, wasn't it? NOT. Just quoting Buddha. He is the ruler of all eggs._**

**_Rei: No he isn't._**

**_Me: Yes he is. Buddha OWNZ!_**

**_Rei: You can't argue against that logic._**

**_Minako and Usagi: Too true._**

**_To answer your questions, yes, I am undoubtledly undergoing a sugar high. Have a nice life! _**

**_Cheers and a half!_**


End file.
